Here's 5 More Minutes of Fame for you, Earl........

First and foremost, my apologies for my absence last week.  I had something written, but I wasn’t exactly satisfied with the finished product enough to post it.  Conceptually it was great, but I just couldn’t get the flow going like I wanted it to go, and in addition I was void of hard statistics and tangibility.  So my expose on the importance of transgendered actresses in the wide world of internet porn will have to wait until I can supply it with a little ‘polish’ and ‘firm’ up the stats a bit.  On the topic of absenteeism, I should tell you now, you may have to become accustomed to it.  One of my promises to myself was to spend a little bit more (or should I say start to spend) time doing the things I want to do, and begin being less task oriented.  So many times on my days off I run myself ragged with errands and odd jobs to the point where I’m exhausted and can’t wait to get back to work so I can relax.  But this year will be different.  For once in my life, I’m going to make a concerted effort to relax, and take in some Brad-Time.  Hit the beach maybe, get down to the ball park occasionally, just do the things I never afford myself the opportunity to do because I always have to be on the go and be productive.  The continuance of the evolution of Brad, if you will.  So if I’m not here on occasion, assume I’m out trying to downgrade my level of O.C.D. and figure out how to unwind and enjoy life.  But fear not faithful readership, I’ll never be gone long enough for you to miss me too much.   

We have one topic to hit on this week, and it’s a close to home topic if you will.  We all know how much I hate it when people fuck with my co-workers, so this guy is going to get undressed.  Then I have to do some emergency repair work on my body and find a way to calm down this stomach.  Two double cheeseburgers from the convenience store at 3:30 am was such a genius move at 3:30 am, but right now, I’m in rough shape.  After I right that ship, I’m off to the pool for a swim, than to the gym to give the arms a pump.  And of course tonight is date night, but not just any old date night.  3rd date night in fact.  I have a feeling I’m slowly crawling into the “friends” category with this one (and not the “good” friends category either) so the M.O. tonight will be figuring that shit out.  Oh, and I won’t be around next week,  as me and a handful of guys are going to head down to the baseball game and maybe take in the “ballet” on the way home, all in celebration of the beginning of my next trip around the Sun.  So, let’s nail this guy’s nuts to the floor and get out of here, I’m sure you got stuff to do as well, right?  Enjoy, and until next time…………………………

Earl Campbell’s of the World, With Nothing Better to Do

So one of my co-workers (a collector, not a driver, of course) was caught (again) publicly taking a nap at work, and somehow, someway this is front page news, according to the comedic comic book known as the Toronto Sun.  Now before we get into the article I have to make one thing abundantly clear, I do not condone napping while on the clock.  Probably because I don’t have a position that allows me to sleep while I’m getting paid, but that’s not the point, honestly, in all fairness it shouldn’t be going on.  With that said, I’d like to give you a couple of quotes from the person who snapped the picture of my dozing colleague and sent it in to our favorite daily edition tabloid, err; newspaper.

So says Earl Campbell;
“I needed change for the subway, so I said “Hello”, and knocked on the window”
(Don’t wake people up while they are sleeping Earl, its rude!) 

“He moved a little, so I wasn’t worried about a medical condition”
(And how long have you been practicing medicine, Earl?)

 “I actually felt bad not paying, do you believe that?”…..
(Earl, I do not)         
Our Hero then goes on to state…………..

“What if there was an emergency?”
(If it was something loud enough Earl, I’m sure the collector would have woken up and handled it). 

 And finally my favorite line, and this is rich folks…..
“Or if there was someone trying to vandalize TTC property?”
(Okay Earl that’s enough, no one’s buying your shit anymore).

Look buddy, you took the picture for one reason and one reason only; you finally found a way to get your name in the newspaper. Congratulations, you did it!  And you even get a bonus cameo in what is slowly becoming the greatest blog ever in the history of the internet.  Good for you, now grab some headboard because here it comes.  Earl, you’re a gutless cry baby with nothing going on in your life.  You’re even worse than that Earl.   You’re about as low as they come.  Because now you are a bona fide, no questions asked, little snitch.  You got your 15 minutes of fame for telling on somebody.  How’s that feel?  I hope it feels great man.  You’re lucky this isn’t “Oz” (and I mean the prison, not the fairy tale either, you little rat).  Here’s what I’d like to know, you narc; after submitting this photo and your bravado laden quotes to that rag of a media outlet, did you contact the TTC and, as you should have done because you’re such a fantastic citizen, pay your fare you evaded to pay upon entry to the subway?  That would be what I would expect from someone so genuinely concerned with acts of vandalism and or emergencies at Summer Hill fucking station of all places on a Wednesday night at 9 pm!  I bet you didn’t, did you Earl?  You probably went home and called your mom, and told her what a great guy you are.  I bet you didn’t tell your dad though, did you Earl?  No you didn’t, because you know that if your dad found out his son was out there ratting on people instead of drinking beers with the guys, and banging broads, he’d probably have a heart attack or dis-own you.  “What if someone was trying to vandalize TTC property?”  Get the fuck out of here, Judas.  Here’s something interesting for you, the fine for vandalism of TTC property is $235.  The fine for fare evasion?  $235.  So, in theory, your behavior was no better than you’re rationale for your resulting behavior.  Oh, and for the record, the fine for being an informer is a life time of not being able to look in the mirror, just so you know.  I hear stories every once in a while about a time in society when people only concerned themselves with things that involved them.  It was a good time to be alive, a quiet time in fact.  Should my colleague have been sleeping at work?  No, absolutely not.  But of what concern is it to the “Earl’s” out there, who believe that because they have a camera in their hands, and the Toronto Sun doesn’t have anything better to print, that they get to play judge and jury? No one does anything wrong at their place of employment that supercedes dozing off?  Here comes the part where Earl gets to remind us that tax payers pay this employee’s salary, and Earl is a taxpayer so it’s his business, blah blah blah.   Get off your fucking high horse’s “Earl’s”.  Everybody (I’d bet even an upstanding douchebag like you) ducks out of work early, mails in your effort from time to time or somehow takes advantage of some sort of system or loop hole.  Hell, I’m the greatest bus driver this world has ever seen, and I don’t even do half the shit I’m supposed to do.  It’s just the way it is.  Mind your business, worry about what directly concerns you, and most importantly, have some integrity and stop fucking snitching, it’s just downright pathetic.  Get a fucking life Earl…………………….